Why??

Why me??? why is it happening all over again and again...

I understand each one of us have a basic nature... and I know that I have a very outgoing nature but then I sometimes feel that I create trouble for myself be being the way I am. I mean what is the need for me to be sweet and nice to all in this bad world :( I every time accept each person I come across with an open heart and then get hurt... No, I am not blaming others here...

I am just complaining about myself... I know there is a real difference in the way others look at relationships (friendships) and the way I do... I know that the way i give importance to others, others will now but then..... why do i still feel bad when people behave a little carefree... why????

why do i get used to someone so easily, why should i even allow people to be my good frnd so quickly and easily,.... and i hate changes which occur in friendship, infact any relationship... things become a routine so soon.... people become so important so soon... am I so lonely inside, that I allow everyone to come close to me and then get hurt....

Ok, I know this particular article doesnt make any sense to you... let it be... as I am just penning down my thoughts cos I dont want to feel bad about things and not because I want someone to read it and judge me... no....

The whole point is I am an idiot to do this to myself. first talk to everyone i come across (well, that a par of my job too) then be friendly with them. then very soon allow them to be close to me (become my real good pal) and then want it to be like that always.... which never happens...GOd!!! ya I am referring to a new friend here... Suddenly I have become so used to this frnd that one day if we dont speak then my day seems to be incomplete... It will be too much to ask if I force my friend yo talk to me atleast for few mins,.. I cant do that, cos I know I am not the other person's priority, but then why should i feel bad if the other person is not able to give me ample time... its their chioce right....


anyways, all i know is i have to be a little more stern with people... and have no expectations with people around... I hope that helps.. not penning down my thoughts more cos I feel to stop here... Though i actually have lots more to say